


Cars Are Hard To Find, Help Me Brother

by thundertale



Series: Post True-Pacifist Route [3]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Car dealers, Papyrus just wants his car, Post True Pacifist route, Sans just wants Papyrus to be happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 17:57:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8543281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thundertale/pseuds/thundertale
Summary: Papyrus wants to buy a car that looks like his bed, and he gets Sans to help him find it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy, but your probably won't because I suck.

Sans would much rather have stayed at home, but Papyrus had asked him to come with him, and Sans didn't want to let down his brother like had done in so many lifetimes that he wished he had no recollections of. On this particular occasion, Papyrus wanted to buy himself a car, because the bicycle Sans had bought himself wasn't quite good enough. In fact, there was a single specific car he wanted, and Sans wasn't sure it even existed.

Growing up, Sans had had to take care of Papyrus, did to their ever neglecting parents. He bought him all he could and more, almost as an apology for not being a sufficient parent, because Sans could hardly provide for himself before he was forced to take care of his little brother. One thing he bought him was not only a vast range of books and action figures, but also a new bed, given that he grew out of his cot before Sans could warn somebody that they were going to have a bad time.

Of course, he was reliant entirely on the dump, and would repair anything anything he found as much as possible. Yet, this time, he had decided to actually purchase the gift for Papyrus. And so, the red race car bed that was the apparent focal point of all of Papyrus' dreams was born.

Now, as Sans walked begrudgingly in to the car seller's, he regretted only admiring pictures of cars instead of resting up on them.

Obviously, Papyrus had learned to drive as soon as they reached the surface. Sans wasn't so much of a failure that he would let his brother end up dead because he attempted to drive without knowing how to. And so, that was not an obstacle in the way of Papyrus' purchase, although Sans would have preferred it if there was something creating a barrier between this level of interaction with the snobby sort of humans.

"Um, what do you two want?" A sales assistant asked, approaching the pair as they entered the store.

"A car, duh?" Sans replied, not appreciating the tone of this human.

"A great one! It had to be red, and fancy! Only the best for me!" Papyrus added, and the sales assistant crinkled her nose.

"...right, well, have fun finding that..." she trailed off, beginning to move away, but Sans gritted his teeth and stared at her.

"Come on, kid, get a...backbone," Sans said, and he grinned at Papyrus' groan and the sales assistant's scoff.

"Look, you're being too vague. I get you're not used to being normal, but I need more detail," she said, clearly strained by the sheer effort of being a good person.

"Oh. Well, I think it'd be too easy for you to find, anyway! I'd never back down from such a challenge! Come on, Sans!" Papyrus said, subconsciously picking up on his brother's current aggressive state. Papyrus led Sans through a labyrinth of metal and paint and tyres, and Sans figured that the scent of leather would have been horrifying, if skeletons could smell anything.

They continued walking, both keeping an eye socket out for Papyrus' ideal car, that Papyrus was so convinced was real, and Sans was less certain of. Suddenly, Sans became aware of something.

"Hey, Paps, I've gotta go quickly. Be right back."

Sans disappeared, teleporting away from his brother and to the sales assistant from before, who was now on the phone, her round nose crinkled in evident distaste. He didn't make himself known, instead using his telekinetic magic to send her phone flying against the faded beige walls, where it was smacked down to the ground, creating an impact that smashed the screen in to a thousand small, black shards.

"What the hell?!" She cried out, staring in dismay at her phone on the floor, while Sans tried his best not to snicker. It served her right for holding prejudices against monsters and not appreciating the pure existence of Papyrus. He decided now would be an appropriate time to resume his prank, and so he blinked, moving behind her.

"Get it through your thick skull," he murmured, and she screamed, "that the surface is our's, too, now."

"Leave me alone! I didn't do anything!" She cried out, spinning on her heel to be met with empty air once again. Sans walked casually in to the office where the sales assistant was.

"Hey, so we need some help back there, finding this specific car," he stated, and kept his face neutral as the sales assistant furrowed her eyebrows as bit back tears.

"U-um, of course," she stammered, now willing to help since she had been so horribly frightened.

"Thanks, we'd appreciate the help," Sans said through his clenched teeth.

Soon enough, Sans led the sales assistant back to Papyrus, who was still looking at cars, comparing shades of paint to his scarf (that costume still had not been shed) and rapping the bones of his index fingers against the headlights.

"So, we're looking for a red sports car, no roof," Sans told her, "and you better make it snappy."

"Y-yes."

"And make it great," Papyrus added, "because I am the Royal Guard, so I deserve the most of the most beautiful cars, just like I deserve the most of the most friends."

"H-how exciting."

The sales assistant found something adequate fairly soon, and Sans and Papyrus were both pleased enough by it.

"So, Paps, are you over-jawed about this car?" Sans prompted.

"That was awful!"

"But you loved it."

"It was relevant and relatable!"

"So you are, then?"

"You're never right, not when I am your challenger!"

"S-so, did you want this vehicle?" The sales assistant asked; both Sans and Papyrus had forgotten she was there.

"Yes!" Papyrus called out, meanwhile Sans merely said: 'Whatever'.

Papyrus had an orange flush on his cheekbones, and Sans had never seen him so happy about something Sans could provide for him. In that moment, not even the price mattered, because Papyrus was just so much more content with that damned car. He hoped that that meant he didn't have to read Peek-a-boo with Fluffy Bunny again tonight. He probably would, though. Ah, well. Sans didn't want to change routine, even if it meant he didn't get to avoid doing nothing.

"Say, that girl at the store acted very strange, didn't she? Do you think she had a crush on me, or something?"

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry this was like my most boring one yet in this series. I really just wrote it to get used to writing Sans and Papyrus.


End file.
